If you get sick of listening to crappy songs for kids then you'll love Kidz Rock, nursery rhymes sung by a wide variety of popular artists and rock stars.
Kids Songs Sung By Rock Stars - Watch more free videos
Showing posts with label kids. Show all posts
Showing posts with label kids. Show all posts
Monday, March 03, 2008
Thursday, March 29, 2007
Do you know me?
A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him. She says hello. He's rather taken back because he can't place where he knows her from. So he says, "Do you know me?" To which she replies, "I think you're the father of one of my kids."Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife and says,"My God, are you the stripper from my bachelor party that I made love to on the pool table with all my buddies watching while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery???"
She looks into his eyes and says calmly,"No, I'm your son's teacher."
She looks into his eyes and says calmly,"No, I'm your son's teacher."
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
THE GOOD NAPKINS
...ahhhhh...the joys of having kids... -Need a good
laugh?
My mother taught me to read when I was four years old (her first
mistake). One day, I was in the bathroom and noticed one of the
cabinetdoors was ajar. I read the box in the cabinet. I then asked my mother
why she was keeping 'napkins' in the bathroom. Didn't they belong in
the kitchen? Not wanting to burden me with unnecessary facts, she told me
that those were for "special occasions" (her second mistake).
Now fast forward a few months....It's Thanksgiving Day, and my folks
are leaving to pick up my uncle and his wife for dinner. Mom had
assignments for all of us while they were gone. Mine was to set the
table.
When they returned, my uncle came in first and immediately burst into
laughter. Next came his wife who gasped, then began giggling. Next came
my father, who roared with laughter. Then came Mom, who almost died of
embarrassment when she saw each place setting on the table with a
"special occasion" Kotex napkin at each plate, with the fork carefully
arranged on top. I had even tucked the little tail in so they didn't
hang off the edge!!
My mother asked me why I used these and, of course, my response sent
the other adults into further fits of laughter. "But, Mom, you said
they were for special occasions!!!"
Isn't it easier to just tell the truth?
laugh?
My mother taught me to read when I was four years old (her first
mistake). One day, I was in the bathroom and noticed one of the
cabinetdoors was ajar. I read the box in the cabinet. I then asked my mother
why she was keeping 'napkins' in the bathroom. Didn't they belong in
the kitchen? Not wanting to burden me with unnecessary facts, she told me
that those were for "special occasions" (her second mistake).
Now fast forward a few months....It's Thanksgiving Day, and my folks
are leaving to pick up my uncle and his wife for dinner. Mom had
assignments for all of us while they were gone. Mine was to set the
table.
When they returned, my uncle came in first and immediately burst into
laughter. Next came his wife who gasped, then began giggling. Next came
my father, who roared with laughter. Then came Mom, who almost died of
embarrassment when she saw each place setting on the table with a
"special occasion" Kotex napkin at each plate, with the fork carefully
arranged on top. I had even tucked the little tail in so they didn't
hang off the edge!!
My mother asked me why I used these and, of course, my response sent
the other adults into further fits of laughter. "But, Mom, you said
they were for special occasions!!!"
Isn't it easier to just tell the truth?
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